...sucks.
I had the test that's going to tell me what I pretty much already know. Now I've got to wait. I'm a file on someone's desk. At some point that person will open it up, look at a few pictures, and decide my fate. Until that point I suppose nothing's wrong.
I'll know for sure later this week.
What do I do with this time in between?
I'm spending a few minutes ranting about it. This digital stream of consciousness does give me a place to vent the internal dialogue. The rest of the time though?
Should I be afraid? A friend who knows what's going on pulled me aside and told me she'd be so scared. There's part of me that is. Absolutely. I'm just a man - though one helluva man. I don't see the point in feeling scared though. Why should that dominate?
Jesus once said something like "Worrying doesn't add anymore time to your life." I think it was the Sermon on the Mount. Look it up. Matthew 6, I think. Should I just waste these days feeling sorry for myself?
Again, not my style.
Head on. Meet the day as it comes. No sense worrying about what a doctor might say a few days from now. I might get eaten by a rabid chicken later on today. No regrets in the moment.
Fuck waiting.
-W
2 comments:
what is the test for? We're all thinking it im just saying it
Just read the last three posts you made. For what it's worth Wikky, I've gone through some pretty damn scary things as well and at one point thought my life just might be over but I made it through, some how, some way I did.
The pain for me was more than just one issue and like you, I didn't wanna jump on the pills so I done what I usually do and went with natural healing or Holistic/holism to some.
Perhaps that might be something to look into if you haven't already, either way I really do hope everything turns out well for you man, I hate hearing this and I do wish you the best.
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